When Love Kills
by ravengal
Summary: One shot. May's older, wiser and madly in love with Drew. One problem: he's been pushing her away for years and she's slowly died inside... but why? Why would he do that to her? DrewxMay, slight AshxMisty


Author's note: Wow... this one-shot was surprisingly hard to write, but it was well worth the effort... and if you thought you were choking on fluff with Love Makes You Do Crazy Things... you ain't choked on nothing yet. (evil smirk)

Also, I own the characters Alice and Natasha... something May says in her flashback is from Fairly Odd Parents... and the title 'When Love Kills' was inspired by the title of a film I saw on TV once, called 'When Friendship Kills'.

* * *

Lying flat on her back on her bed at the Petalburg City Gym, Pokemon merchandise all around her and her shoes on the floor, May sighed, staring at the ceiling. Downstairs, she could hear her mother, Caroline, preparing dinner, her father, Norman, chatting to her about his latest gym battle, her little brother, Max, arguing with his travel companion and secret crush, Natasha, who had short brown hair and green eyes and who May knew returned his feelings, Brock and his fiancée, Alice, who had long blonde hair and brown eyes, trying to break them up, Ash and his girlfriend, Misty, laughing and joking and Pikachu and Azumarill, the Pokemon couple, playing a game.

They had all come here after a long day of May ascending through the Grand Festival. No, she hadn't won, but that's not what depressed her to the point of saying tha she wasn't feeling well and heading upstairs to her room.

Sitting up and hugging her knees to her chest, she glanced to the left of her at the two framed photographs on her vanity table that she valued above everything. Both were set in the exact same place... at the park, just in front of the water fountain... with everyone in, relatively, the exact same spots.

In the first photograph, eight-year-old Max was positioned on the far left of the picture, his right eye closed in a wink and his left hand performing a piece sign to the camera, flashing a toothy smile. Beside him was May herself, as a ten-year-old, her left hand up to her mouth and both eyes closed, laughing heartily at eleven-year-old Drew, who stood beside her with his arms folded and eyebrows furrowed, angled slightly away from her, a furious blush on his face. Next to him was eleven-year-old Ash, who was smiling at Pikachu, the yellow creature perched on his right shoulder. Next to him was twelve-year-old Misty, smiling gleefully at the camera and clutching baby Azurill to her chest. Finally, on the far right, was sixteen-year-old Brock, his knuckles on his hips, smiling proudly at all his friends.

May allowed herself a tiny smile as she gazed back at Drew, remembering just what she had said to make him blush like that.

_May was preparing herself to give the camera her mother was holding her sweetest possible smile when she noticed, from the corner of her eye, Drew turn away._

"_Huh? Something wrong, Drew?" she asked, turning to look at him._

"_Hmm?" he replied, turning back round. "Oh, well... I'm just not good with cameras is all..."_

_May snorted. "You? Not photogenic? Are you kidding me?"_

_Annoyance crept into Drew's features. "What's so funny about it?"_

_Her knuckles went to her hips. "Pfft! Come on! You have an ego the size of the Hoenn region, Mr.-" She flipped her hair with her right hand, exactly the way Drew normally would, dropping her left hand back to her side. "-I'm Too Sexy For My Sexy!"_

_Drew folded his arms and turned away from her, but he couldn't hide the way the blood rushed straight to his face. May burst out laughing at the incredulous sight._

The smile disappearing, May glanced at the second and very recent photograph, where, on the far left of the picture, thirteen-year-old Max stood, his knuckles on his hips and his eyes closed, attempting to say something impressive to twelve-year-old Natasha, who was laughing at him the same way that May had been laughing at Drew. Next to her was May herself, as a fifteen-year-old, smiling placidly at the camera, her hands lying flat in front of her and her fingers intertwined, yet her eyes looked positively dead to the world. Next to her was sixteen-year-old Ash, his arms wrapped around the waist of seventeen-year-old Misty, who had her arms wrapped around his neck, their lips tightly locked. Next to them was twenty-one-year-old Alice, smiling at the long-since evolved Azumarill in her grasp, which had its arm out to Pikachu, smiling gleefully at it. Finally, at the far right, twenty-one-year-old Brock was smiling down at Pikachu in his grasp, which had its arm out to Azumarill, smiling gleefully back at it.

Tears entered May's eyes and she furiously rubbed them away. God, she hated herself for being so jealous of everyone... She hated how she wanted to hurt Natasha for being so close to Max... or Misty for dating Ash... or Azumarill for dating Pikachu... or Alice for being engaged to Brock... or, Heaven forbid, her mother for being married to her father... but she could never help feeling that way... She could never help wanting to rip other females' throats out for being happy with a male when she wasn't... ever since _he_ turned his back on her.

May let herself fall back onto the bed, a tear dribbling down her left cheek. Why couldn't she just forget him and move on? Misty, her best friend in the whole world, had suggested it to her many a time... but she couldn't... she just couldn't.

She used to be such good friends with him when she was ten and he was eleven. She'd even had the tiniest of crushes on him... but, at the time, she hadn't deemed it important, as she'd been too focused on winning contests and being the best Pokemon co-ordinator she could possibly be.

_Drew... _she thought, sniffling, _why must I love you so much that it hurts? And why do you have to get even more goddamn attractive every time I see you? _She flipped over on her side, letting the tear splash onto her pillow. _Why must you insist on the hair-flipping whenever I'm around? It just reminds me of how much I love you, which makes it hurt all the more..._

When she was twelve and he was thirteen, she'd begun to notice that he spoke to her less and less with each meeting, each time more arrogantly than the last, just as he'd done on their first encounter, only worse. This really hurt her, as she'd not long since realised that she actually loved him.

She'd only gotten to see him a few times a year at the different Grand Festivals, as she'd had no more contest ribbons to win... yet, each time would be considerably worse than the last, until it had reached a point where he'd literally push her out of the way whenever she'd tried to talk to him and mutter dark threats under his breath before storming off. If that wasn't bad enough, one day last year, when she was fourteen and he was fifteen, he'd pushed her so hard, she'd fallen on the floor quite painfully, her back smashing against the brick wall. He'd glared at her heatedly for a moment before departing... and she'd broken down into uncontrollable sobs in anguish.

Since that day, she'd left him alone... but the emotional scars remained. She may have plastered on fake smiles and told people she was fine... but she was far from it. Every single time that Drew had pushed her aside and told her to leave him alone _or else_, the black hole in her heart had grown larger and larger... until it had consumed her completely. She was madly in love with him... and he really seemed to hate her.

* * *

Stabbing her fork miserably into her steak and kidney pie, May decided she wasn't up to eating it, so she looked up, about to ask to be excused... and only then did she notice that all twenty eyes in the vicinity, human and Pokemon alike, were upon her, adorning worried expressions.

"Uh..." she said, looking at each and every face in turn, "what?"

"You're miserable again, sweetie," Caroline muttered, clasping her hands together on the table. Norman placed his right hand on top to help comfort her.

"Yeah, so?" May asked in a monotone, her face deadpan. "I'm fifteen. Aren't I allowed to be miserable?"

Ash and Misty exchanged glances before returning their gaze to May, who gave a heavy sigh, pushing out her chair and leaving the table. Instinctively, she headed for the stairs again. After all, her room was her sanctuary... her own private escape from the rest of the world... a place where she could gather her thoughts and, if she felt like it, cry into her pillow without anyone there to ask her what was wrong.

* * *

"Come on, May," Misty said from outside the bedroom door, which was locked and, therefore, preventing the red-head entry.

"No," May replied, cuddling Skitty to her chest, who was meowing and rubbing against her clothing.

"Please?"

May sighed. "What makes you think I wanna go swimming, the way I'm feeling?"

There was a slight pause. "It's about Drew again, isn't it?"

May scowled. "Isn't it always? It's so pathetic I don't even wanna talk about it anymore."

Misty sighed. "It's not pathetic... but I do think you should at least try to move on... take each day as it comes, instead of worrying about your desired future and how his... _current actions_ may be messing with it."

May didn't have to open the door to know that Misty was frowning... and for this, she was grateful. She didn't blame her either. After all, he was a dick... a complete and utter dick... and calling him that tending to ease the pain a little.

"What do you think, Skitty?" May asked softly, scratching behind Skitty's ears. The kitten Pokemon meowed affectionately. "Should I go swimming with Ash and Misty?"

"Nya nya!" it replied, pawing at her crossed legs.

May smiled, turning her head towards the door. "Alright, Misty, I'll come."

"You will?" Misty asked, a sudden rise in her voice. May knew she was smiling.

"Yeah. Just give me a minute to put my swimsuit on and I'll be good to go."

"Great! Meet you downstairs."

* * *

After placing their clothes and bags full of Pokeballs in their lockers, May and Misty entered the nice warm showers to cleanse themselves before heading to the pool. Misty had rolled her eyes at the "Please shower before swimming" sign, but hadd decided to follow through with it anyway.

Misty was wearing a baby blue bikini to symbolise how much she loved water Pokemon. May, the more modest of the two, was wearing a light purple two-piece swimsuit consisting of a sporty top half with thin straps over the shoulders and tiny shorts.

Finally, they were walking out into the pool area, hearing the familiar echoing chatter of the people in the water and inhaling the familiar smell of chlorine. Spotting Ash's head resting on his folded arms on the side of the pool, almost directly in-between the shallow and deep areas, the girls casually strolled over to him. His head shot up as he caught sight of Misty.

He whistled as he looked her up and down. "Nice bikini," he commented. May could almost see the drool hanging out of his mouth.

Misty knelt down and lightly whacked him upside the head. "What have I told you about staring?" she asked, trying not to laugh.

Ash rubbed his head and rolled his eyes, though the smile never left him. "That I shouldn't do it because it indicates lust and not love."

"That's right." Ruffling his hair, she climbed into the water beside him.

May, trying to ignore the pang in her heart from seeing the two so close, climbed in too, but, from the corner of her eye, she spotted a flash of green hair over at the deep end. Whirling around, she noticed _him_... wearing dark blue trunks and sitting on the edge with his feet dangling in.

Simultaneously, her heart skipped a beat and her stomach plummeted. Why did he have to show up _now_, of all times? And_ here_, of all places? She was seriously going to take Misty's advice today! Didn't Fate _want_ her to recover?

"Hmm?" Misty asked, following May's gaze. "Hey... is that Drew?"

"Uh... huh..." May replied, nodding slowly.

Misty's face bared a look of righteous fury. "Well, come on! I'm not just gonna stand here and let him get away with treating you like shit!" She grabbed May's arm and began to drag her towards Drew.

"Misty, please! I really don't want to talk to him! Misty!"

May watched as Drew looked up from the water, directly into her eyes. He frowned and stood up, walking away. Misty let go of May's arm and charged after him, hoisting herself up and out of the pool.

"Hold it, Drew!" He stopped, his back still turned to her. May clambered up and stood beside Misty. "Just who do you think you are, treating my friend the way you do? She's not just a piece of shit on the sidewalk, damn it!"

"I don't have time for this," he replied, his tone icy. He began to walk into the boys' locker room.

Misty's knuckles landed on his hips. "You do realise that I'll follow you in there, right?"

"But you do realise that this room's for boys only, right?" He was in the room by this point, but Misty just waltzed on it behind him.

"Yeah, but, since it's you I'm following, I really don't care." A few random boys wolf-whistled, but she just rolled her eyes, grabbed Drew's arm and dragged him back outside.

"Hey! Let go of me!"

"Not until you talk to May."

"I have nothing to say to her!"

"Well, _think_ of something!"

Once Misty had dragged Drew all the way back over to May, she let go of his arm, knuckles landing back on her hips. It was at this point that Ash, wearing dark green trunks, appeared alongside May.

"What's going on?" Ash asked, eying Drew with some distaste.

"C-Can I speak to Drew in private?" May asked hesitantly.

"Um..." Misty said, glancing at Ash, who nodded. "Okay. We'll be over in the water if you need us."

Once they departed, May turned her attention to Drew, who was looking elsewhere with a frown on his face, his arms crossed over his bare chest.

"Why must you keep doing this to me?" May muttered.

"Doing what?" Drew snapped.

May's eyes slowly filled with tears as she hugged herself. "_That_. Why do you have to keep pushing me away? Why do you keep refusing to talk to me? Why do you never even _look_ at me?" Her voice lowered to a murmur. "Why do you have to hurt me?"

Drew finally turned his head and locked eyes with her, his frown instantly disappearing. May inwardly gasped. His eyes... they looked so emotional... There was no cold barrier over them... He looked so lost... and vulnerable...

"W-What?"

"You... you didn't know? You didn't know you were hurting me?"

Drew blinked at her, his green eyes practically pouring out emotion. "No, I..." He suddenly hardened and turned away from her. "What does it matter?"

A tear dribbled down her right cheek and she sniffled. This caused him to look round at her again. Once again, his expression softened.

"I'm sorry you hate me, Drew... I really am... and I wasn't going to talk to you at all today... it's just Misty dragged me over here..." May turned round and began to head back to the water. She stopped. There was one last thing she wanted to say, so she turned her head. "You know," she whispered, "it wouldn't hurt so much if I didn't love you..."

She managed to glimpse his arms dropping to his sides, his mouth falling open and his eyes widening before she looked away from him and climbed back into the water, swimming over to Ash and Misty, who'd moved over to the shallow end.

She was only in there for a few seconds before she heard, "May! Wait a minute! _May_!" and a loud splash from the deep end before Drew came swimming up alongside her, grabbing onto the side and lightly gripping her arm.

"What do you want?"

He gently pulled her to the side before climbing up and seating himself there. "Please, just... sit with me while I explain a few things."

May sighed. "Fine." Climbing up, she seated herself next to him, yet maintaining a noticeable distance.

Drew, once again, locked eyes with her and she, once again, noticed the incredible amount of emotion flooding through them. Whatever he was about to say, she could tell he would really mean it. Dread consumed her.

Drew sighed. "Okay, well... I guess I should start at the beginning. You see, when we were young... I really liked you... despite the way I used to talk to you... I mean, you were pretty, you were fun... everything a guy could want, really... but... as soon as neither of us needed to earn ribbons for the Grand Festivals anymore... I-I began to miss you... so much it began to hurt... and I realised that... I-I loved you."

May's breath caught in her throat. He _loved_ her? But then why-?

He continued. "I could only ever see you... _talk_ to you... at these Grand Festivals... which were only a few times a year... and it hurt so much... because I-I always said to myself, 'Today's the day. I'm going to tell May how I feel'... but I never did... so I thought the best thing to do would be to... push you away... get you to hate me... then I wouldn't have to talk to you anymore... It helped, but not very much... because I'd always see that hurt look in your eyes... and seeing you hurt always hurt me too."

"B-But... the push..."

Drew's eyes shone and May realised, with some horror, that he was holding back tears. No wonder his voice was wavering...

"I... I hadn't meant to do that... I just got so frustrated because you wouldn't do as I asked and leave me alone... so I pushed you a little too hard... I know I was glaring on the outside, but... on the inside, I'd completely shattered... After I stormed off and was where you couldn't see me, I..."

"Y-Yeah?"

Drew took a gulp. "I ran into the boys' bathroom and c-cried into the sink."

May gasped. "Y-You did?" Tears were spilling down her face even more now.

Drew nodded. "I'm so sorry... I never said it... but I'm so sorry... I did it to stop my heart from breaking... but I never thought that... I'd hurt _you_ in the process."

May rested her head on his bare right shoulder. She felt him freeze for a moment, then he relaxed and tilted his head so it touched hers.

"I love you, Drew... and you have no idea how much it hurt me for you to treat me like that."

"I'm sorry... I know it probably it isn't a good enough thing to say to you... nor is that really a good enough excuse..."

May sighed through her nostrils. "Well, it's better than what I thought... I thought you hated me."

Drew chuckled. "No, I could never hate you, May... I-I love you."

It was that moment that Ash and Misty had chosen to swim over. Both had confused expressions on their faces and looked from May to Drew, then back to May again.

"So... I take it everything's been sorted out?" Misty asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Mmm hmm..." May replied dreamily, closing her eyes and enjoying the blissful feel of Drew's shoulder. "He loves me too..."

"He does?" came Ash's shocked voice.

"Yeah..."

"... Well, I guess we'll leave you two lovebirds alone then," Misty said before May heard them swim off again.

Lifting her head up, May turned her body round to look Drew in the eyes. He was currently running his fingers through his thick green locks, smiling slightly and gazing at her cautiously, as if she would slap him if he said or did the wrong thing.

Smiling, May leaned forward slowly and, noticing he was copying her motions, shut her eyes before she felt the contact of her lips on his. Electricity shot through her body and happiness filled her soul, causing the black hole in her heart to vanish. She felt another spark when his arms wrapped around her waist, so she flung her arms out blindly and neatly wrapped them around Drew's neck. He may have gone drastically out-of-character over the years, but he was still the same Drew she knew and loved... who loved her back just as much... and that was all that mattered.


End file.
